"So. The beauty pageant." by leigh767

It's not the first word you associate with a pageant, but I have to say it all went hilariously, particularly the beginning though it had nothing to do with the contestants.

You see, it was all about the yaks.

The pageant production team apparently wanted to infuse the show with a bit of local exotic flavour while in the land of the Tibetans so they had the 32 contestants ride in on huge yaks the color of vanilla beans. Those yaks were really something... groomed, sweeping long hair not unlike a mammoth's. So here we have 32 yaks coming on stage with 32 beauties on their backs. You can imagine the hoo-hah the minute they made their entrance-- everyone started whispering to their neighbors, "Wah, niu hao piao liang!" which approximates to "Woah, the yaks are beautiful!"

Then of course we had the usual incidences like a yak halting its strut (strut!) halfway and holding up the rest of the line. And it was only when it moved away was the reason for its stopping shown in plain sight for all to see-- yeah, poo. Poo here, poo there, poo everywhere! It's amazing the amount of poo 32 yaks can generate on stage in 3 minutes. So the dancers of the next filler item had to work their routines around the ah, new stage props.

Then the contestants tried to look glam walking around said props in stilettos. Oh, prime time entertainment, I tell you.