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| Page Views: 7,588 | Him & Her :-s by marimar_72 - last update: Aug 19, 2005 |
A couple drove down a country road for
several miles, not saying a
word. An earlier discussion had led to an
argument and neither of
them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a
barnyard of mules, goats,
and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically,
"Relatives of yours?"
"Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."*
------------------------
A husband read an article to his wife about
how many words women use
a day .... 30,000 to a man's 15,000. The
wife replied, "The reason
has to be because we have to repeat
everything to men... The husband
then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"*
----------------------
A man said to his wife one day, "I don't
know how you can be so
stupid and so beautiful all at the same
time." The wife responded,
"Allow me to explain. God made me beautiful
so you would be attracted
to me; God made me stupid so I would be
attracted to you!* |
More Jokes Definition of Bravery:*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bravery is arriving home late after a night out, being confronted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to ask: Are you still cleaning,or are you flying somewhere?*
Friends of women:*
A wife was not at home for a whole night.
So she tells her husband, the very next morning, that she had to stay at
her girlfriend's apartment overnight.
So the husband calls 10 of her best girlfriends and none of them
confirmed that!*
Friends of men:*
A husband was not at home for a whole night. So he tells his wife the
next morning, that he had to stay at his friend's apartment overnight.
So the wife calls 10 of his best friends.
5 of them confirmed that he stayed at their apartments that night.
The other 5 claimed that he is still with them! |
Men And Directions! A man absolutely hated his wife's cat and decided to get rid of him one day
by driving him 20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the park.
As he was getting home, the cat was walking up the driveway.
The next day he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away. He put the beast
out and headed home.
Driving back up his driveway, there was the cat!
He kept taking the cat further and further and the cat would always beat
him home. At last he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then
left, past the bridge, then right
again and another right until he reached what he thought was a safe
distance from his home and left the cat there.
Hours later the man calls home to his wife: "Jen, is the cat there?"
"Yes", the wife answers, "why do you ask?"
Frustrated, the man answered, "Put that son of a *** on the phone, I'm
lost and need directions!" *
Wife: "I wish I were a newspaper, so you can hold me every morning!"
Husband: "I wish you're a newspaper TOO, my dear so I can have a NEW
ONE every morning!!"* |
Male Vs Female Prayers FEMALE PRAYER*
Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he's gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind,
Knows the answer to "how big's my behind?"
I pray that this man will love me to no end,
And always be my very best friend.
Amen.
MALE PRAYER*
I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with big boobs who owns a liquor store
and a bass boat.
I know this doesn't rhyme and I don't really give a damn.
It is after all, a prayer, not a poem! |
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Manyana Thu Jul 24, 2008 12:09 UTC
ya3ni enti matroo7i elli aba aro7aha 3'air fil wagt 3'air al monasib? you're w/ sherine? say hi to her and your babies too, hugs, a:^) | iinocent Thu Jul 24, 2008 11:21 UTC
heyyyyyy!! nyc profile!!! i lyk ur abaya!! um i need a lil hep..can u temme me a gud gym or club for ladies in jeddah sumwhere near sabaheen st. thnx... will b w8in 4 ur reply!!! my idz iinocent@vtmail.com | soncnica Sat Jul 12, 2008 08:07 UTC
Hey, girl! Happy (belated) birthday! I hope you enjoyed it and wish you the best year to come :) xxxx | Tina-Perth Sat Jul 12, 2008 03:25 UTC
Hello beautiful lady, sorry I missed your birthday, I haven't been online for a while. I hope it was wonderful and that the year ahead is magnificent! T xx |
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