Travel Tips

1.You point with your lips.
2. You eat using your hands and have it down to technique.
3. Your other piece of luggage is a balikbayan box or red-white-blue striped bags.
4. You nod your head upward to greet someone.
5. You put your foot up on your chair and rest your elbow on your knee while eating.
6. You use a rock to scrub yourself in the bath or shower.
7. You have to kiss your relatives on the cheek as soon as you enter the room.
8. You're standing next to eight big boxes at the airport.
9. You collect items from hotels or restaurants "for souvenir's sake."
10. Your house has a distinctive aroma.
11. You smile for no reason.
12. You flirt by wearing a foolish grin on your face while raising your eyebrows repeatedly.
13. You go to a department store and try to bargain the prices.
14. You use an umbrella for shade on hot summer days.
15. You scratch your head when you don't know the answer.
16. You never eat the last morsel of food on the table.
17. You eat every last grain of rice in your bowl, but don't eat the last piece of food on the table.
18. You hate to waste food....
19. You go bowling.
20. You play pusoy,mahjong and tong-its.
21. You find dried up morsels of rice stuck to your shirt.
22. You prefer to sit in the shade instead of baking in the sun.
23. You add an unwarranted "H" to your name, i.e. "Jhun," "Bhoy," or "Rhon."
24. You put your hand in front of you as if to make a path and say "Excuse, excuse" when you pass in between people or in front of them.
25. Your middle name is your mother's maiden name.
26. You buy tons of bath towels when they go on sale.
27. You love to buy sale items even when you do not need them.
28. When there is a sale on toilet paper, you buy 100 rolls and store them in your closet or in the bedroom of an adult child who has moved out.
29. You are a member of the "SDK" Club. (Samahang double knit).
30. You are still wearing outdated clothing you had when you first came to the USA.
31. You like "Stateside," not "local."
32. You send out RSVP invitations even if the party is to be at home.
33. You love to wear all your expensive jewelry when attending parties: 2-3 rings on both hands, 3 necklace or bracelets at the same time.
34. You unwrap Christmas gifts very carefully, so you can save and reuse the wrapping (and especially those bows) next year.
35. You only buy Christmas cards after Christmas, when they are 50% off.
36. You save grocery bags, tin foil, and tin containers.
37. You use grocery bags to hold garbage.
38. You always leave your shoes at the door.
39. You play a musical instrument.
40. You twirl your pen around your fingers.
41. You have a collection of miniature shampoo bottles that you take every time you stay in a hotel.
42. The condiments in your fridge are either Price Club sized or come in plastic packets, which you save/steal every time you get take out or go to McDonald's.
43. Ditto for paper napkins - infact, in Hong Kong, McDonald's has stopped leaving napkins out because they were all being stolen. Now you are rationed to one or two each.
44. You fight over who pays the dinner bill.
45. You majored in something practical like engineering, medicine or law.
46. When you go to a dance party, there is wall of guys surrounding the dance floor trying to look cool.
47. You always look phone numbers up in the phone book, since calling Information costs 50 cents.
48. If you are an OCW, your monthly phone bill is over a third of your salary.
49. You only make long distance calls after 11 PM.
50. You or Your parents send money to their relatives in the Philippines.
51. You know someone who can get you a good deal on jewelry or electronics.
52. You keep used batteries.
53. Your toothpaste tubes are all squeezed paper-thin

54. You say "comfort room" instead of "bathroom."
55. You say "for take out" instead of "to go."
56. You "open" or "close" the lights.
57. You ask for "Colgate" instead of "toothpaste."
58. You ask for a "pentel pen" or a " ball pen" instead of just a pen.
59. You refer to the refrigerator as the "ref" or "pridyider."
60. You say "kodakan" instead of "take a picture."
61. You order a "McDonald's" instead of a "hamburger" (pronounced ham-booh-jer).
62. You say "Ha?" instead of "What?"
63. You say "Hoy!" to get someone's attention.
64. You answer when someone yells "Hoy!"
65. You turn around when someone says "Psst."
66. You say "Cutex" instead of "nail polish."
67. You say "for a while" instead of "please hold" on the telephone.
68. You say "aray!" instead of "ouch!"
69. You say "he," when you mean "she" and vice versa.
70. Your sneeze sounds like "ahh-ching" instead of "ahh-choo."
71. You prefer to make acronyms for phrases such as "OA" for over-acting, "DOM" for dirty old man, and TNT for well, you know.
72. You say "air-con" instead of "a/c" or air conditioner.
73. You pronounce the following words: "hippopo-TA-mus," "com-FOR-table," "bro-CO-li," "and "Mongomerry Ward."
74. You say "brown-out" instead of "black-out."
75. You say "Uy!" instead of "Oops."
76. You pronounce "F" for "P" or "P" for "F."

77. You use walis tambo and walis ting-ting as opposed to the conventional broom.
78. You have "Weapons of Moroland" shield hanging in your living room.
79. You have a portrait of "The Last Supper" hanging in your dining room.
80. You own a karaoke system.
81. You own a piano no one ever plays.
82. Your house is cluttered with borloloys.
83. You have a "tabo" in the bathroom.
84. You have a rose garden.
85. You have two or three pairs of tsinelas at your doorstep.
86. You display a big laughing Buddha for good luck.
87. You have a shrine to the Santo Nino in your living room.
88. You own a "Barrel Man" (shwing!)
89. You have a parol hanging outside the house during the Christmas holidays.
90. Your lampshades still have the plastic covers on them.
91. You cover your living room furniture with bed sheets.
92. You have plastic runners to cover the carpet in your house.
93. You refer to the VCR as the "Beytamax."
94. You have a rice dispenser.
95. You own a rice cooker.
96. You own a turbo broiler.
97. You own one of those fiber-optic lower lamps.
98. You own a lamp with the oil that drips down the strings.
99. You have a giant wooden fork and spoon hanging in the dining room.
100. You have wooden tinikling dancers on the wall.
101. You own capiz chandeliers, lamps, or placemats.
102. You use the dishwasher as a dish rack.
103. You have never used your dishwasher.

104. You own a Mercedes Benz and call it "chedeng."
105. You own a huge van conversion.
106. Your car chirps like a bird or plays a tune when it's in reverse.
107. Your car horn makes three or more different sounds.
108. Your car has curb feelers on it.
109. You hang a rosary on your car's rear view mirror.
110. You have those air fresheners in a bottle.

111. You have aunts and uncles named "Baby," "Girlie," or "Boy."
112. You were raised to believe that every Filipino has an aunt, uncle, or cousins.
113. Your dad was in the navy.
114. Your dad thinks he can fix everything himself.
115. Your mom or sister is a nurse.
116. You get smelling kisses from your grandma.
117. Your parents call each other "mommy" and "daddy."
118. You have a family member that has a nickname that repeats itself, i.e. "Deng-deng," "Ling-ling," or "Johu-johu."
119. You live with your parents and you are 30 years old (and they prefer it that way). Or if you're married and 30 years old, you live in the apartment next door to your parents, or at least in the same neighborhood.
120. If you don't live at home, when your parents call, they ask if you've eaten, even if it's midnight.

121. You put hot dogs in your spaghetti.
122. You consider dilis the Filipino equivalent of french fries.
123. You think that eating chocolate rice pudding and dried fish is a great morning meal.
124. You order things like tapsilog, or tocilog at restaurants.
125. You instinctively grab a toothpick after a meal.
126. You pick your teeth at the dinner table (but you cover your mouth).
127. You dip bread in your morning coffee.
128. You refer to seasonings and all other forms of MSG as "Ajinomoto."
129. Your cupboards are full of corned beef, hash, spam, and Vienna Sausages.
130. "Goldilocks" means more to you than just a character in a fairy tale.
131. You appreciate a fresh pot of rice.
132. Your baon is usually something over rice.
133. You bring baon to work everyday.
134. Your neighbors complain about the smell of tuyo on Sunday mornings.
135. You eat rice for breakfast.
136. You use your fingers to measure the water when cooking rice.
137. You wash and re-use plastic utensils and Styrofor cups.
138. You have a supply of frozen lumpia in the freezer.
139. You have an ice-shaver for making halo-halo.
140. Your tablecloths have tell-tale "tuyo circles" on them
141. You eat purple yam-flavored ice cream.
142. You gotta have a bottle of Jufran handy.
143. You fry Spam and hot dogs and eat them with rice.
144. You think half-hatched duck eggs are a delicacy.
145. You know that chocolate meat" isn't really made with chocolate.
146. Your stove is covered with aluminum foil.
147. Your kitchen has a sticky film of grease over it.
148. You eat all meals in the kitchen.
149. Even if you're totally full, if someone says they're going to throw away the leftovers on the table, you'll finish them.
150. You have Tupperware in your fridge with three bites of rice or one leftover chicken wing.
151. You don't own any real Tupperware-only a cupboard full of used but carefully rinsed margarine tubs, takeout containers, and jam jars.
152. You reuse teabags.
153. You have acquired a taste for bittermelon (ampalaya).
154. You prefer your shrimp with the heads and legs still attached-it means they're fresh.
155. You always cook too much.