"Chattanooga's Worst" Alpine Lodge Tip by 54321Kris

Alpine Lodge, Chattanooga: 9 reviews and 0 photos

After staying in the hotel 1 night, we felt very taken advantage of. At $150.00, this "cabin" was overrated, the advertising was purposefully false and misleading. The room was not more than 12 X 12. When I asked prior to our arrival if the rooms were small, I was informed they were ?cozy?. If you define cozy as an 18-inch separation between the bed and Jacuzzi, then you will be in heaven. This was the only walkway in the entire room, save the entrance, which led straight to the bathroom. The jacuzzi was enjoyable, but it made loud, screeching noises when turned on, which made watching the orange-toned TV or relaxing, virtually impossible. Two walls of the cabin were lined with gold speckled wall mirrors, which were cheesy and shady, rather than romantic. The linens appeared to come from a 1950's garage sale and the bathroom was out of the 1960s. The place had the ambiance of a side-of-the-road, seedy love-motel. The bathroom appeared dirty and unsanitary. Instead of complimentary and sanitary bathroom amenities, there were two refillable tubes of liquid. Each had a handmade sticky-label on it that stated "shampoo" & "conditioner". The bonus was the tube that included a piece of the previous guest's hair. Bathroom tricks included being able to distinguish the different shades of brown stains on the floor through the thin toilet paper. The room was advertised as having a couch and chair but, the couch was a wicker 2-seater that one sits on a porch and the chair was a white plastic patio chair. In order to access the closet, one had to move the "couch" either into the jacuzzi or on top of the bed. On the other side of the room (the foot of the bed), access to the masking tape-decorated porch door was limited due to a second interior plastic chair being placed and jammed between the bed and the door. I was willing to stay one night only because we arrived so late. After 3 hours of sleep, I was so angered by feeling duped, we left. I should mention we were the third party in line to complain.

Unique Qualities: None. This was such a huge disappointment, an expensive one at that.
My reason for writing this review is that I work very hard for my money. I planned to have a wonderful and romantic weekend, and was almost on the edge of tears near the end. My spirits eventually rose, but I was that disappointed, and nobody should have to have this sort of experience.

Address: 4328 Cummings Hwy, , Chattanooga, Colorado 37419
Price Comparison: more expensive than average
Directions: Below Lookout Mountain
Phone: 423-821-2546
Price: US$120-180
Theme: Hotel
Website: http://

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  • Written Dec 1, 2004
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