VirtualTourist.com will close on Feb 27th.

Please save any personal content and exchange contact info with other members you?d like to stay in touch with. Thank you for your contributions to the VirtualTourist community.

"Gratefully pinched..." Sheffield Warnings Or Dangers Tip by caprice4u2

Sheffield Warnings and Dangers: 11 reviews and 10 photos

 
 

<BR>
<BR>
<BR>
<BR>
<BR>
<BR>
<BR>
<BR>
<center>
<font color=red>
<font size=+1>
Gratefully pinched From the Stanley Holloway record
<font color=PURPLE>
<center>
There's a famous seaside place called Blackpool
<BR>
<BR>that's noted for fresh air and fun
<BR>
<BR>And Mr. and Mrs. Ramsbottom went there with young Albert, their son.
<BR>
<BR>A fine little lad were young Albert, all dressed in his best, quite a swell.
<BR>
<BR>He'd a stick with an 'orse's 'ead 'andle, the finest that Woolworth's could sell.
<BR>
<BR>They didn't think much to the ocean, the waves they were piddlin' and small.
<BR>
<BR>There were no wrecks and nobody drownded, fact, nothin' to laugh at all!
<BR>
<BR>So, seeking for further amusement they paid, and went into the zoo,
<BR>
<BR>Where they'd lions and tigers and camels and cold ale and sandwiches, too.
<BR>
<BR>There were one great big lion called Wallace whose nose was all covered with scars;
<BR>
<BR>He lay in a som-no-lent posture with the side of 'is face on the bars.
<BR>
<BR>Now Albert 'ad 'eard about lions- 'Ow they was ferocious and wild;
<BR>
<BR>To see lion lyin' so peaceful just didn't seem right to the child.
<BR>
<BR>So straightway the brave little feller, not showin' a morsel of fear,
<BR>
<BR>Took 'is stick with the 'orse's 'ead 'andle and stuck it in Wallace's ear.
<BR>
<BR>You could see that the lion didn't like it, for givin' a kind of a roll,
<BR>
<BR>'E pulled Albert inside the cage with 'im and swallered the little lad - 'ole!
<BR>
<BR>Now Mother 'ad seen this occurrence and not knowin' what to do next,
<BR>
She 'ollered 'Yon lion's et Albert!' An' Father said 'Ee, I am vexed.'
<BR>
<BR>They complained to an animal keeper who said 'My, wot a nasty mis'ap;
<BR>
<BR>Are you sure it's your boy 'e's eaten?' Pa said, 'Am I sure? There's 'is cap!'
<BR>
<BR>The manager 'ad to be sent for; 'E came and 'e said 'Wot's to-do?'
<BR>
<BR>Ma said 'Yon lion's et Albert, and 'im in 'is Sunday clothes, too!'
<BR>
<BR>Father said 'Right's right, young feller, I think it's a shame and a sin
<BR>
<BR>To 'ave our son et by a lion and after we paid to come in.'
<BR>
<BR>The manager wanted no trouble, he took out his purse right away,
<BR>
<BR>Sayin' ''Ow much to settle the matter?' Pa said 'Wot do you usually pay?'
<BR>
<BR>But Mother 'ad turned a bit awkward when she saw where 'er Albert 'ad gone.
<BR>
<BR>She said 'No, someone's got to be summonsed!' So that was decided upon.
<BR>
<BR>And off they all went to p'lice station in front of a Magistrate chap;
<BR>
<BR>They told what 'ad 'appened to Albert and proved it by showing 'is cap.
<BR>
<BR>The Magistrate gave 'is opinion that no one was really to blame,
<BR>
<BR>And 'e said that 'e 'oped the Ramsbottoms would 'ave further sons to their name.
<BR>
<BR>At that Mother got proper blazin' 'And thank you, sir, kindly,' said she-
<BR>
<BR>'Wot, spend all our lives raisin' children to feed ruddy lions? Not me!'</centre>

Review Helpfulness: 1.5 out of 5 stars

Was this review helpful?

  • Written Aug 25, 2002
  • Send to a Friend
  • Add to your Trip Planner
  • Report Abuse

Comments

caprice4u2

“Peace costs nothing, share it and feel `rich`”

Online Now

Female

Ranked Member
Member Rank:
1 3 2 3 6

Have you been to Sheffield?

  Share Your Travels