Cal-Mart, Miccosukee's "Little Supermarket": "Everything INCLUDING the kitchen sink" Miccosukee Shopping Tip by 850prc
Miccosukee Shopping: 2 reviews and 4 photos
Our neighborhood store is Cal-Mart, also know of as "the little supermarket". The folks who run Cal-Mart are a friendly lot, and they've always got a smile for you when you come through the door.
It's nice to know that we have such a place only a couple of miles from my house. Otherwise, I'd be making a lot of longer trips into Tallahassee or nearby Monticello for all sorts of things.
Even though it IS just a little store, you'd be amazed at all the stuff (crap in some cases) that Cal-Mart sells.
gasoline, nails, condoms, bullets, fresh hamburger, non-dairy topping, roach killer, staples, incense from India (like the owners), soft drinks, wine from Lodi, batteries, shoes, horse food, bottled water, freshly baked pizza, grass seed, CO2 cartridges, spray paint, propane cylinders, boiled peanuts, lottery tickets, cans of soup from two different centuries, pay phones, fish oil (I never knew that you had to oil fish), frozen french fries, rutabagas, barbecued pulled-pork sandwiches, paper towels (get some if you buy a pork sandwich), toothpaste (get some if you buy a pork sandwich), antacid tablets (get some....), window cleaner, tampons, chewable vitamins, notebook paper, bibles, t-shirts, disposable diapers (get some if.... just kidding), pocket knives, popcorn, bananas, WD40, rat poison, ice cream bars, badly expired 35 mm film, perfume (probably from Lodi, too), rolling papers, tobacco AND Nicorette gum, aspirin that was manufactured before the invention of Tylenol, any kind of cheese that you'd ever want so long as all you'd want is American, Swiss, Cottage or Cheddar, cotton balls, saw blades, fishing rods and lures (be sure to oil the fish after you catch it), women's underpants in two sizes (XXXL and XXXXL), mouthwash (get some if you buy a pork sandwich), stamps, free kittens (sometimes), paperback novels, Kool-Aid packs that were made before they started putting the sugar in them, ......... continued below!
What to buy: generic country music cassette tapes, clothespins, shaving cream, Clearasil (with an expiration date sometime back in my teenaged years), YooHoo, homemade individual fried apple pies, chicken necks (in case your chicken needs a new neck), dress socks, air freshener, cold beer, crickets (live crickets for fishing, not that "Cricket" cigarette lighter thing), boating life jackets, Red Devil lye, all-purpose flour (obviously a lie... I can think of lots of purposes for which flour is no good...ice skating for example), sewing thread, balsa-wood airplanes, generic Frosted Flakes (if Tony the Tiger ain't on the box, it ain't frosted flakes IMHO), charcoal, witch hazel hemorrhoid pads, reading glasses (get some if you're going blind reading all of this foolishness), road maps, garden hoses, potting soil, men's cologne (Hai Karate-level), antifreeze (also called cat poison), cat food (if they're out of antifreeze), pickled pigs' feet, all kinds of beef and kind-of-beef jerky, turpentine, lard, double-stuff Oreo cookies, cheesecloth, epsom salts, shelled pecans, car wash soap, illegal fireworks (behind the counter, and available for purchase ONLY by individuals well-known to the Cal-Mart staff), snuff and other smokeless tobacco products (...and be prepared to show ID. Cal-Mart won't sell these items to anyone under six years old), mops and buckets, and......oh yes...... friendly Miccosukee natives. If you can't find something, just ask. Either they'll find it, or they'll convince you that you don't need it.
What to pay: Depends on who is running the cash register and how much they like (or don't like) you. They do have a sign indicating they charge extra if you're mean and ornery. It helps to not be a Yankee. (just kidding)
Address: Intersection of Veterans Memorial and Moccasin Gap
Directions: Right in the center of Miccosukee, right at the only flashing traffic light
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