"Chortle Chortle...." Adaptor-Plug's Profile

.
TOPOPHILIA.

I'm in the challenging and tricky years that lie between birth and death. I'm coping. What's more is that I seem to be mastering the intricacies by the day. If they said anything at all, then they never said it was going to be easy. Then again, easy ain't fun.

Seeing that, probably like you, I was nurtured in the pre internet Facebook LinkedIn Plaxo Share Yourself and Spread It About To Complete Strangers Dot Com age I enjoy doing things in the way my Auntie Violet, Uncle Doug and Mrs Russell next door recommended. That is, as Auntie Vi said (while Her Doug was dragging a puff on his pipe), ''Ian. <insert Auntie type pause> Ian. If one uses the restaurant toilet then one should treat that toilet as if it was a toilet in the restauranteur's home. Should a sign state "Wash Your Hands", then you wash your hands."

The sign on the VT Travel Pages says...

"Your (travel page) intro is a short summary on the time you spent in a particular place. <snip> Share whatever <snip> you think <snip> and encapsulates your experience."

So that's what I'm doing; my sort of travel page introductions to my sorts of travelled to places; doing thinking and having thinks. And when I'm in the mood I'll top it off with an encapsulated experience or two. I'll do me writing as if I was holding a dinner party, and as if I was getting the conversation going between you and me geographical party mates. As caring hosts should.

"Clifford. Clifford, have you met Barbara? No? Well. Clifford, this is Barbara. And Barbara, this is Clifford. Barbara's been known to balance strawberries on her kneecaps at charity events for the British Red Cross in the Sudan, you know. She has more talents, I've heard."

(Quietly retreat and leave them to it.)

Hopefully my attempt at place intros and experiences won't be like an infant school class "okay children, fifteen minutes to write up your holiday diary, best handwriting" that many seem to enjoy reliving. Please stab me in my thighs if I remotely approach the adult version of the same... "spout the right facts" and "genuflect before the Altar to Lonely Planet." Because nearly all of that type of templated, constricted-mind drivel can be nabbed for nowt from guide books shoplifted from any decent store. Not only that... ridiculous amounts of the same are available in that heinous epile of but-honey-it's-democratic "knowledge", Wikipedia. What's the point in me e-adding to it?

Travel page and place introductions then. That's what I'm into. Non rateable and thus non rankable introductions. Yes, yes, oh yes, oh yes, Meg Ryan in a diner, yes. Introductions are important.

It is only when the polite introductory hellos are out of the way that we can comfortably get onto the small talk about the spot we visited. The spatial equivalents of Audrey-at-68, That Sheena-at-15-No-Net-Curtains-No-Morals-Whatseover, the draught in the parish church hall, and Mr. Caslake's ailments (he brought them on himself if you ask me).

My topophilic introductions start here (Click on This Link) and pootle along in sequence according to when we first met. (You can do an internet search on "Yi-Fu Tuan" if you fancy getting deeper into "Topophilia". If you are well into it, visit the University of Madison, or even the Geography Faculty at Nottingham, and have a natter with Professor David Matless. He's a nice enough man.)

I'm doing a few pictures and writing about the spots for myself if you really want the blunt truth. But in the spirit of international chumminess you're welcome to dive in and swim around with me up the shallow end. Or, as others may describe it, let's hang around outside the restrooms chatting about where we've been, smoking cigs and lending out our lighters after the conference sessions are done.

MUSICAL VIDEOS AND SLIDESHOWS

We went to the DPRK (North Korea). It was a nut exploding experience. An Overview Video (Click On Here to Play). DepRoK is well wonky and proof that, when it comes to us humans, nurture rules over nature.

Oooooo. I managed to get back to my hometown and sit for a while in the Natural History Museum, Kensington. I watched the time and I looked at the people going by and gazed at the dinosaur stuck on the wall. I hadn't done that for decades. Then gave it an amateur lash at making a time lapse video of the experience. (Click On Here to Play). (I love dinosaurs. It seems a fair few others love dinosaurs too. Love, love, love.)

Should you be interested, you can watch snips of the forty years and five continents showing our world, before we settled in Bangkers. In a 200 photo zipalong squeezed into 100 seconds. 100 seconds 'cos we get bored quick. (Click on Here to Play) .

My favourite. DINOSAUR. (Click on Here to Play). A short piece that arose out of a project I worked on recently. It sums up the essentials. ...even if we do need our youngsters to remind us.

Merely dearly, as a polite addition, I should let you know, I'm the sort that thinks "leave a comment for XXX" plonked at the bottom of a beautifully crafted internet page is nothing short of encouraging spray painting graffiti into the margins of a Gutenberg Bible. Chiselling yer name into the walls at the Collisseum.

Would you tell your mum you had stuck a Post It note on Leonardo's Last Supper saying "Great Start Davvo, love that image, looking forward to the Restaurant Tips"?

No. You wouldn't.

Because, reasoned beings leave their reasoned suggestions in the suggestion box or they pop the curator a postcard. You can do the same with me, please. Bang me a mail. It's more of an effort, I know, but it's a worthier effort. I'll whizz you back a reply.

But, relax... if you do get the bottom-of-the-page-leave-a-comment-spray-can out, I will think 'thanks for your note', and I will read it (I promise), and I will appreciate the thought. Then it will get the escrub with my eBrillo.

My topophilia starts here... (Click on This Link)

Read it. For free. In not long it's to be polished, by someone less stoned and someone more sober. The contract's done. How's about that Auntie Violet?