"A Deeply Shallow World;-)" Top 5 Page for this destination Puerto Banus by SabrinaSummerville

Puerto Banus Travel Guide: 86 reviews and 288 photos

Virgin Trip

People reacted with genuine astonishment when I told them this was to be my very first trip to Mainland Spain. After all - I'm a European and anyway don't half the Irish population own "a place" on the Costa del Somethingorother? Indeed they do, but this is just what I've been trying to avoid all of my adult life to date.

I recall as a student working Summers in a factory in Waterford. At that time all the full timers there would be off to "mar-bell-a" or "port-o-baaan-us". I was left with a lasting impression that these were places to avoid, inhabited as they were likely to be by the masses, and full of drunken revellers. This is not meant as a reflection of my co-workers in the factory, as some of them are among the finest people I have met; it is, rather, a wish to avoid people I know when I get away from my own personal rat race.

So.....What's it Really Like????

It's every bit as wealth soaked as they say, only moreso. It's not necessarily a nice kind of wealth either - many many people who are overly conscious of bettering everyone else. "Keeping up with the Jones'" on a grand scale.

One morning I got into the hotel elevator and a woman got in after me. For the short ride from the top floor to reception she stared unashamedly at my Rolex and obviously compared it with her own (which was almost identical but without the diamonds). I could see the dollar signs in her glazed eyes as she mentally calculated what mine cost. That sort of behaviour is going on everywhere in PB.

As for the collagen; did I mention the collagen? That, and the botox, and the size 0's, and the sun withered skin now heavily smothered with fake tan in a valiant but hopeless effort to reverse the years of sun damage...

Everyone's blonde (the women, that is). I turned every head in a restaurant one night because I was the only female there who was non-blonde and overweight. As the week progressed I discovered that there were many more like me, but "we" seem not to frequent certain establishments.

The Return Visit

Don't you call my girlfriend a dog;-))

Returning to PB in May/June 2009 I see that noting has changed, apart from the fact that I saw more and learned deeper secrets.

Sitting at a yacht-view table in the lovely Chateau Mona Lisa I watched the convertible Rolls Royces drive by. "Oh look", I said, "Isn't that Simon Cowell?" Maybe it was, but I now doubt it having learned since that the gorgeous cars are rented by the hour to punters who are prepared to pay as much as €1,500.00 for the one hour privilege.

If you're millionaire hunting, watch out for these fakes!! As they said in the Merchant of Venice "All that glisters is not gold."

Last visit to Puerto Banus: Jun 2009
Intro Updated Jun 10, 2009
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Reviews (21)

The Place to Meet in PB Nightlife (2)

Before I left for Puerto Banus, EVERYONE was talking about Sinatra Bar and telling me how I simply MUST go there. It's... more travel advice

Quiet Cocktail Bar Nightlife (2)

Bar Sofia is the name of the quiet cocktail bar attached to the Gran Hotel Guadalpin Banus. The liveliest time to drink... more travel advice

Stag Weekends Things to Do (4)

One thing that struck me very visibly about PB was the vast number of stag and hen parties taking place here. These... more travel advice

Great Designer Fakes Shopping (4)

Street traders lurk on every corner in Puerto Banus, plying their wares - fake designer handbags, belts, watches,... more travel advice

Warnings and Dangers (1)
The Seedier Side....
Hotels (1)
Spectacular Roof Gardens
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Comments (4)

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ericbee Jul 24, 2009 at 9:51 AM

if you ever find yourself in playa de las americas whilst in tenerife,a large selection of Belen Doñate Shoes,Boots & Handbags can be found at Libra-Shoes in Pueblo Canario.
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sampkperry Mar 29, 2009 at 5:28 AM

You know sabrina there is a small ladies shoe boutique in South Wales called envee which do Belen Donate boots. visit the website at www.envee.co.uk or you can email them to at enquiries@envee.co.uk sam
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Kristymamoo Nov 16, 2007 at 7:51 AM

I have to agree with your summary of Puerto Banus. I spent a day there and, although thoroughly enjoyable, I couldn't spend much longer there!! I too had a fab meal at Los Bandidos - sorry I missed the Madonna shop though. Lol :-)
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sourbugger Jun 22, 2007 at 1:50 AM

i always think that whole sand art thing is very zen buddhist !