"The real Midlands" a Nottingham Travel Page by sourbugger

There is a road in the centre of Nottingham which has a very simple sign on it (one-way street). One side points rights and says "The North" whilst the other one says "The South".

Nottingham is a truely vibrant city with a rich history. It plays on it's connections to Robin Hood quite well - and has obviously enourmously helped the local tourist industry.

The following chapter is however about another local hero, who seems to sum up to me the plain-speaking wit of the local character : Brian Clough (football manager)

UPDATE : SEPT 2004, A sad day. Brain passed away recently after stuggling with his health. His obituaries will at least stand testament to this colourful of characters.

Here are some of his more famous sayings :

1) "At last they've got a manager who speaks better English than they do" - On the appointment of Sven Goran Eriksson as England manager.

2)"If God wanted us to play football in the air, then he would have built a pitch in the clouds"

3)"If I had an argument with a player we would sit down for twenty minutes, talk about it and then decide I was right!"

4) "We took the job because we are out of work."
- Brian Clough, when asked why he and Peter Taylor had joined Brighton and Hove Albion on 1st November 1973.

5)"I'm not saying I was the best manager in the business. But I was in the top one."

6) On Manchester United's decision to pull-out of a previous FA Cup competition and play in the World Club Championship in Brazil instead.
Clough commented: "Manchester United in Brazil? I hope they all get bloody diarrhoea."

7) when Posh Spice lost her luggage. "Who the hell wants fourteen pairs of shoes when they go on holiday? I haven't had fourteen pairs in my life."

8) "I can't even spell spaghetti never mind talk Italian. How could I tell an Italian to get the ball - he might grab mine." On the influx of foreign players.

9)"I bet their dressing room will smell of garlic rather than liniment over the next few months." On the number of French players at Arsenal.

10)"On occasions I have been big headed. I think most people are when they get in the limelight. I call myself Big Head just to remind myself not to be." Old Big 'Ead explains his nickname.

11) "The ugliest player I ever signed was Kenny Burns." A Clough complement for a talented player.

12) "Stand up straight, get your shoulders back and get your hair cut." Advice for John McGovern at Hartlepool.

13)"Take your hands out of your pockets." For a young Trevor Francis as he receives an award.

14) "The Derby players have seen more of his balls than the one they're meant to be playing with." On the streaker who appeared during Derby's game against Manchester United.

15) Walk on water? I know most people out there will be saying that instead of walking on it, I should have taken more of it with my drinks. They are absolutely right." Reflecting on his drink problem.

16)"Don't send me flowers when I'm dead. If you like me, send them while I'm alive." After the operation which saved his life.

17)"Players lose you games, not tactics. There's so much crap talked about tactics by people who barely know how to win at dominoes." Reflecting on England's exit from Euro 2000.
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18) "You don't want roast beef and Yorkshire every night and twice on Sunday." On too much football on television.

19) ''That Seaman is a handsome young man but he spends too much time looking in his mirror, rather than at the ball. You can't keep goal with hair like that." On England goalkeeper David Seaman.

20) "He should guide Posh in the direction of a singing coach because she's nowhere near as good at her job as her husband." Advice for David Beckham.

"Brian Clough's worse than the rain in Manchester. At least God stops that occasionally"
-- Bill Shankly